In 2016, I found myself. In 2017, I struggled with who "my best self" was. There was self doubt and body image issues and my anxiety completely consumed me. I was so afraid of not living up to people's expectations, that I was paralysed. I was constantly worrying about what's happening tomorrow, 2 days from now, next week that I'd miss just enjoying the moment.
Before you blow me off, let me share a little more.
When you wake up in the morning, feeling like P Diddy, I have to give myself a pep talk to get out of the shower some days. Because my shower is safe. It doesn't make my chest tighten. It doesn't make me feel like I'm running a marathon in a pool of pudding. In the shower nothing else matters.
But unfortunately the hot water eventually turns cold.
What do I want for 2018? To simply enjoy life again. But how do you do that?
When you wake up in the morning and say to yourself, “I am going to enjoy today,” what exactly happens? Your day may start out well - hit up the gym and have some laughs with some great people. But the excitement may dissipate during your drive to work as you start going over your to do list and stress over how you're going to get it all done.
So instead of choosing a vague phrase as my resolution, I want to find something that can impact my life in unexpected ways. Focus on doing something specific, put action on it and have the people in my life help me complete it.
For example, help improve my outlook on life by writing 1 thank you note a week for a year. Expand my mind by asking 12 friends for book that changed their life, read one per month, then discuss it with them. Enjoy my time away from work and refill my cup by planning at least 1 fun activity every month.
Maybe I'll do all of the above? We'll see. For now I know that I need, I deserve, and I want more out of life than what I allowed myself to have in 2017.
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